When Christmas comes, most people want to curl up in front of the fire and watch nostalgic claymation specials where strong moral lessons are taught and all ends well. But for some of us, the true joy of the holidays comes from watching holiday stuff we know no one else is watching. Dark and twisted things that, while still revolving around Christmas, tell very different stories than the usual holiday and Christmas crap we are used to. From demons who bring satanic toys to children to a mighty face off between the Krampus and Santa himself, here are 6 Christmas horror movies that make the season much more gorier. And more enjoyable.
Deck the halls with guts and innards, as they always say.
Cool Christmas Horror Movies
Just dropping this year, just in time for Chistmas 2015, the Krampus plays off the ancient German tale of a creature who comes and steals kids who are bad for Christmas so he can take them home and eat them.
Though the PG-13 seems to limit some fo the stuff they can get away with in this film (and in this film it just looks like the Krampus gives the kids possessed toys, which is still cool) but safe to say Krampus will climb the list in popularity once it arrives, just based on timing.
Imagine if Santa was not so much a man as a demon? And what if there were hundreds of them doing Santa’s job whilst actually trying to bring the giant Krampus back to life? That is the thought behind this brilliant foreign film about a team of excavators who find Santa and decide to take him hostage.
Without ruining anything, it does not go well for them. And quick aside, this is my favorite Christmas movie of all time and if you see it, it might become yours, too.
Another tale about Santa actually being an evil presence disguised as good, Sint deals with the very idea of the awakening of an ancient evil and seeing what it is really capable of. What makes Sint so fucking awesome is not only their cool spin on the Santa mythos, but how they make him look and what they make him capable of.
I will just say this so I do not ruin too much: Check out Santa’s ride in this film. Pure badass.
All I should have to do here is show you the opening of this movie and you will be sold. Does it take itself seriously? Not in the least. Does it make you laugh and squirm and turn away sometimes? Sure does, and that is what makes it so fun. Perhaps the funniest ending to a ‘Santa VS. the good guys’, the scene will have you cracking up and realizing just how much fun this scary Christmas movie is, even though it is cheesy as hell.
And come on, that intro!
Though this movie’s title may throw you off because it doesn’t sound like Christmas horror, it is. Oh boy, it is! The Children is a genuinely unsettling flu that comes over the kids on Christmas and makes them into seriously screwed up little psychopaths. It’s funny, it sounds like it wouldn’t work, but the scene when the kids trick the dad into sledding into a red wagon full of pitch forks and sharp garden tools will change your mind on that.
Plus we all know kids are evil and this movie has the balls to finally admit it. On Christmas, no less.
I am not saying if this is good or bad. It is exactly what you think it is. It is about a group of sentient Christmas trees who are no longer into the idea of being chopped down and decorated in people’s living rooms every year so they decide to come alive and kill some of the humans responsible.
Yes, it is pure campiness. Yes it is silly and zany. But you know what else it is? A nice change of pace from watching all the same Christmas specials we watch, year after year. This movie is like A Charlie Brown Christmas, only with the tree coming alive at the end and killing off all the kids.
If that doesn’t sound good to you you must be broken.