Christmas can be a great time to be a geek, especially over the last decade when geekdom has risen up to take over all aspects of pop culture. Whereas being a geek in the 90’s often meant getting gifts that were not quite in your wheelhouse (here gamer fan, have this sweater that will make you look like you are 40 years older than you are when you wear it), but those times have changed.
Even stores that never carried geek stuff have little sections for Pixar stuff and video games now. The meek (geeks) have truly inherited the earth. and that also now means that Christmas gifts are way cooler because more people have more access to things that we geeks love, from Dr. Who memorabilia to Back to the Future shwag, this is a truly shining time to be alive for a geek.
With that in mind, here are the ten best stocking stuffers for geeks in 2016, coming from someone who has been a true geek since the day I was born (seriously, I came out of my mom with glasses on, she is still mad and physically torn up from it).
Geek Stocking Stuffers
1. GeekFuel
I’m sorry but I have to be honest. I have gotten a lot of mystery boxes in the last year to review, and they are the best things ever. They are often filled with themed gifts that the receiver would love but has no idea what the contents are until they actually get and open the box.
The even better part is, you give a subscription as a gift (a lot of these companies, this one included offer monthly or yearly subscriptions) so people can get mystery boxes in mail more than once and have that joy of Xmas day many times throughout the year. And with Geek Fuel, they aim exactly at our demographic and do so perfectly.
Seriously, click the link above and order me some. I work hard, and my family still gifts me crap.
2. Donut Earbuds
Donuts are awesome and music is awesome so it really makes sense that someone would merge the two in a workable way. Plus they are from Urban Outfitters so you are not only a geek, but a geek hipster which seems to be a big thing this year.
You will be the hippest of all the thin mustached hipsters, who doesn’t want to be pretentious for Christmas? Pretentiousness is the gift that keeps on giving the whole year through.
3. Doctor Who Toe Socks
Come on, these things are adorable! On each toe is a little icon representing many of the greatest aspects of the show, from some enemies to the Tardis itself (don’t worry the socks are much bigger on the inside).
Truth be told, already ordered my queen a pair of these. I just cannot foresee how these would not make any foot happier and cuter. Yes, apparently feet can be happy, by the way.
Moving on….
4. Star Wars BB8 Tea Set
A lot of geeks like tea (Earl Grey is my homeboy) and pretty much all geeks loved the Force Awakens and the cute little droid from it who stole the show, BB8. So it only makes sense you would order someone this cute as hell teapot rocking BB8’s likeness. On top of that, when it steams it makes BB8 noises*
*I just made that part up.
it actually screams in pain and agony when the water boils, but I will leave that for you to discover.
5. Hologram Viewer
Jesus, what? That is the best thing about doing this list every year for last decade. I always find at least ONE thing that even I didn’t know I wanted or even existed. In this case, it is this badass hologram viewer (that costs under 12 bucks!) that allows you to view images off your phone as holograms and make holograms off a special app you can then show off in hologram form to other holoheads (yes, I just made up a killer nickname for the hologram fanbase).
Seriously, this thing is badass. That 80’s retro look on top makes the thing even cooler. By the way, I know this is too big for a stocking but shut your mouth. It is too awesome not to include.
6. Unicorn Phone Stand
What do I even need to say about this? Nothing. The picture speaks a million words for me and they are all majestic AF.
Dare I say, uniphone? Yes, Yes I do. This turns your phone into a f*cking uniphone for the win.
7. Deadpool Cufflinks
Honestly, nothing says “I am ready to attend this high-level public event” like wearing cufflinks of a pansexual superhero on your high-end tailored suit. It is like you are there to do business, yet also kick some ass and get laid if the situation calls for it. And come on, every situation calls for both those things, let’s not lie to one another here.
Also, if you have a lame corporate job where you have to wear a suit and feel like a sellout in doing do, rocking these will let the boss know you get it and can follow rules, but at the end of the day, YOU MAKE YOUR OWN or something like that.
8. Classic Casio Calculator Watch
Holy crapsteaks. When I was a kid this thing was the shit. If you rocked one of these in the 80’s or early 90’s, you were the IT kid in your school (so everyone ended up getting them). But over time, they got lame and who needs a calculator on their wrists was the conclusion most came to.
Well, I DO. WE ALL DO. and Casio knows this so they brought back their classic Casio calculator watch, details for details. Crap, I just ordered one of those for myself, too. Well, at least I KNOW I am finally getting good gifts this year. They just have to be from me.
*Sobs
9. Flux Capacitor Phone Charger
Every year since the first year I have done these lists I have always had at least one replica of the Flux Capacitor from Back to the Future in some form. This year’s version might be the best yet because you can plug that thing in to charge at work or a party and instantly get geek cred among coworkers and friends.
Hell, retro nostalgia is so massive right now that everyone would probably react to this thing, not just geeks!
10. FNAF Freddy Fazbear Pizza Set
To say this simple game became a phenomenon would be a bold understatement, and this pizza set would be a fitting gift for fans of a game that takes place at a “haunted” pizza place.
The kit includes all you see above, as well as an unrelenting sense of fear that an animatronic bear is gonna jump in your face and make you shit your pants at any point.
That part of the gift is priceless, actually.
11. ABCs of Evil Brand Tee Shirts
Teaching kids the alphabet has never been more fun with stuff with geeky alphabet blocks (T is for Totoro!), but it’s not all about blocks. Geekery has embraced tee shirts like nothing else, so geeky alphabet tees are not surprising. But this brand is something else – all you find is evil. You know, W is Weeping Angels. V is for He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. J is for Joker. B is for Baron Harkonnen. My only issue – you’ve got to spend quite a bit to complete the collection.
12. Batman Cufflinks
Batman would never forgive us if we didn’t have his cufflinks in the list while Deadpool made it.
13. Iron Man Gray Dot Tie
While we’re getting all fancy and stuff, we might as well throw in a tie. This tie is no ordinary tie, mind you. RDJ actually wore it on the red carpet, so get your Tony Stark on.
14. “May the Force be With You” Aurebesh Jedi Tungsten Carbide Men’s Ring
It may not be the One ring, but with the Force, the ring may give you a hand in getting your partner to say yes.
15. “Always” – Stamped Silverware
Get your feels on with this stamped spoon. “Always” is printed with safe ink, and you can use the spoon every day to eat for real, but if I were you, I’d keep it in a nice display cupboard and take it out for special dinners with fellow Potterheads.
Or hey, just order whoever a RemBox and call it a day!
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