How To Properly Warn Your Spouse About How Fallout 4 Is Gonna Lead To Your Divorce

The time is upon us. We all need to let those we love most know the truth: we are about to vanish. We are ALL about to go underground into our proverbial Vaults so we can start playing Fallout 4. This also means we will not be leaving said Vaults for a couple years. Sorry, these games are huge and fans love combing every inch of the Fallout universe. Any soul expecting this to be any different is just a fool. This is going to be the biggest and best Fallout yet, which means, right now might be a good time to make peace with your loved ones and let them know you will be gone for awhile. Most friends will accept this, but where it becomes a problem is in a marriage or relationships. If you don’t play Fallout and your spouse does, we have some bad news.

This game is going to take priority over you for the next few years, potentially. Best someone tell you now.

It’s Just A Game (But Not Really)

Hahaha, some fools may think that it’s just a game, but that is why they are fools. Fallout 4 is no game. It is a living, breathing universe stuffed full of insane and awesome things to do that could, honestly, keep you busy for 400 hours, easy. I say this because I put 200 hours into Fallout 3, and this game is said to trump that game big time. Question is, are you confident enough to let someone you love vanish for 400 hours?

You may think I am exaggerating, by why do you think there are Fallout widows? This is an actual thing.

Prepare Yourself

We are only telling you so that you, being the spouse of a Fallout 4 player will know, this world will be like Heroin to the player. They will be telling you one more hour at two in the morning only to waddle into bed at noon the next day. They will become pale and somewhat quiet, shambling around, filling time until they can play again.

Matter of fact, you’ve seen The Walking Dead, right? Yeah, between game sessions it is kinda like that, except they Fallout players wont eat you. But just be ready. This is not a diss on you or how much that person loves you. Fallout is just a magical world of escape and us nerds fully migrate there. It is not that we love YOU less than Fallout. It is just we love you LESS when a new Fallout comes out. We don’t mean to. Fallout games are just that good.

So What Should A Fallout Widow Do?

The first thing a Fallout widow needs to understand is, these games don’t come out very often. So if you have to deal with this for a few years every decade or so, I would say it is no big deal. They are not crawling away to cheat on you or do ACTUAL drugs. They are just so swept up in the narrative fiction and realization of the wasteland that it starts becoming more alluring than their world. Think of it like the Matrix. Yes, we know we are plugged into a machine and it may not be healthy, but we also know it is better than our reality, so some of us choose to stay there.

But how is a world full of marauders and bandits better than the real world? Easy, it gives us purpose. As much as some may believe our souls are fed with work and what we do and our family, there are those of us who still struggle. Those of us who find the real world exhausting and ugly. So to put on some cool armor and escape that to shoot mutants is truly an escape for us in a world it can normally be hard to escape from.

So Respect It

So in closing, respect the fact that you are a Fallout widow for a small window every half decade. Why? Because it means he or she is not out cheating. It means he or she is not shooting up and really ruining your life. It simply means they want a little healthy escape and found a place for that. It also means they are happy, and if you truly love someone selflessly, that is all you want for the,.

If anything, spouses should be grateful. This is about as harmless as it gets. If you think him escaping into Fallout for four hours as a time is bad, imagine if that was the strip club. Yeah, puts it in perspective, huh? So respect it, because actually, you have no choice. Fallout games > love.

Simple fact.

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