I'm getting old for Starcraft II

So after the 7th probe comes out, I should have just enough minerals to warp in a Pylon. Then two more probes to get the Gateway and … finally Zealots. Or wait .. did the first Pylon come after the 5th probe? OMG.

That was me a couple of days ago. Twelve years ago, circa 1998 I knew Starcraft build orders like the insides of a bag of Lay’s. I wasn’t the best, but I was pretty adept in micromanagement, countering zergling rushes and reaver spamming with both finesse and results. Twelve years ago, at 17 years old, Starcraft was pretty much the axis of my social skills. It was actually the only other reason why I bought a 28.8 kbps modem to do an IPX connection with my cousin over the phone. To ensure gaming bliss without interruption, I’d disconnect the other two extension lines at the house in case someone would pick up the phone and sever our connection.

A couple of days ago I downloaded, installed and played through a couple of maps for Starcraft II’s beta. The first few play-throughs had me building and upgrading everything and doing a Noah by creating two of every unit available just to see what the sequel had to offer.

Then I tried doing a little bit more competitive play, remembering the build orders, trying to be “fast” and not stock up on minerals or gas. That’s when it hit me — my mineral and gas count were in the thousands — which obviously meant I wasn’t maximizing my builds. It was then I also realized that I hadn’t expanded my base yet. Oh crap. And thus, the epiphany: I’m getting old for Starcraft II.

I live in an area with a very sizable Korean community. A lot of local kids earn extra cash by teaching the Korean kids how to speak English and I found out later on that most of the time spent in “lessons” is a 2 vs 2 game of Starcraft: Broodwar with English being taught as a way to communicate between teams. “Attack the expansion.” “Do a Reaver drop here.” “Siege tanks. Counter with Guardians.” That’s what kids do these days apparently, and for me, at 29 I’ve come to the realization that gaming has been moved from a priority hobby to a quick fix — hence my reference for 20 minute “get in, kill stuff, get out” games like Bad Company 2 and Modern Warfare 2. Occasionally I’ll bite into the great adventure titles like Mass Effect, Fallout and Dragon Age … but those are rare.

I’m really looking forward to Starcraft II. Not to play competitively on Battle.net but to get in a few laughs with gamer friends who, like me, have aged, slowed, and can look back and laugh at how we all now suck.

At one point, you’re really bound to run out of vespene gas.

Have something to tell us about this article?
Let us know

or Comment Below

Gaming Trailers

More Like This
Pokémon TCG: Sword & Shield | Lost Origin
Latest Trailers
House Flipper | Official Gameplay Trailer

Got a tip?

Let us know